Megan Dennis: January 2017

The Secrets to Being Independent

January 31, 2017

(I forgot that yesterday was Monday to be completely honest. I wrote this on Saturday and it is now Tuesday when I’m posting this)

It is currently midnight on Saturday and since I have received 0 messages from friends all day, I decided to write a post.

No I’m not complaining in the slightest.

Everyone needs time away from other humans.

And quite honestly, I like being alone.

But yeah, it hurts when no one wants to know how your day is going.

But it’s okay. I understand it’s embarrassing to be friends with me in the first place and I understand it hurts your social reputation. I get it. I know it’s embarrassing for you to post a photo with me because someone might see it and unfollow you because of it. I guess that’s the way friendship works these days. Very sad and disappointing really.

But that’s not actually what I wanted to talk about. Like I said, no one cared to ask me how I’m feeling so I have to vent somewhere. I’m actually not the weak b**ch people make me out to be. In fact, I’m probably the most independent woman you’ll ever meet. Definitely the most sarcastic. I’m also kind of funny sometimes. Still, I’m not good enough to hang out with the “cool” people, but that’s okay because they probably don’t even know the difference between a minor and major scale.

Okay, enough about my sad, depressing social life. Now let’s talk about you.

I want you to put your hand on your heart. Right now. Put down your device and put your hand on your heart. You want to know something? That heart belongs to you. You. Not your mother, not your father, not your best friend. It’s yours. Now feel your arms, your legs, your stomach, your hair. Those things are yours too. They belong to you.

How you choose to express yourself is your choice. What clothes you wear, how you style your hair, everything. You are meant to be your own person. It’s normal to want to be like everyone else. It’s normal to want to be “cool” and wear that brand of cosmetics everyone is raving over, or wear the same style of shirt that everyone loves. You want to fit in, right?

Let me tell you the first secret: “cool” isn’t cool anymore.

I know, shocker right? Let me tell you something. People who do everything the same as everyone else are not cool. It’s like you’re trying so hard to be “as good” as them, but really it makes you look weak and it’s not going to get you anywhere. In fact, the so-called “cool” people will probably laugh at you and you’ll go home crying. And that’s not what you want.

So be a trend setter. Do things different that show YOUR personality and not someone else’s. Copying someone else’s personality and making it yours is being fake. Don’t be fake. Please. I’ve met way too many fake people and I really feel sorry for their lack of self-confidence. Develop your own unique personality that makes everyone else want to copy you. This is a huge part of becoming independent.

Next, be outgoing. Yes, all you introverts, I’m talking specifically to you. This is really hard, especially for the shy ones. So here’s your challenge: next time you’re in a public setting, don’t sit with the same people you always sit with. And most of all, don’t go hide in a corner and not talk to anyone else. Sit next to someone you don’t know. I know, it’s super scary but this is how people meet their soulmates and best friends. BRANCH OUT.

Developing your own personal style is a huge part of being independent. Yes, this is for all the guys out there too. Style is important. Wear things that you feel comfortable in and things that make you stand out from everyone else. If everyone else is wearing a purple sweater, DON’T WEAR A PURPLE SWEATER. Being different is essential to being independent. Your style is what everyone sees when they look at you so make it something you want people to recognize you for.

Being independent takes time, but I promise you that you’ll feel so much better about yourself in the end. Every process is a learning experience, and one you will be glad for in the end. Keep growing, keep changing. And most of all, love every moment along the way.

Before I go, I want to share a song with you. This has been one of my favorite songs for a long time and I love the message in it! I thought it would be fitting for this post:).

Also, I wanted to tell you that I have decided to only post on Thursday from now on. My schedule has been pretty busy and I want to make sure I post on the days I tell you I’m going to post, so from now on posts are going up on Thursdays. Thank you so much for all your support and reading my posts!!

equality

Feminism and Equality

January 23, 2017

“Oh yeah, I forgot, you’re a feminist aren’t you?”- every male I’ve ever talked to about politics.

Yes, I am a feminist. No, I’m not a “man hater”. I believe that every human being on earth should not be mistreated according to their race, gender, sexual orientation, etc. Even the definition of feminism says, “[feminism] is the advocacy of women’s rights on the basis of the equality of the sexes”. Just so you understand the facts, here are some of the basics about feminism:

Feminism is defined as the belief in social, political, and economic equality of the sexes
The goal of feminism is to challenge the systemic inequalities women face on a daily basis
Contrary to popular belief, feminism has nothing to do with belittling men. In fact feminism does not support sexism against either gender. Feminism works towards equality, not female superiority
Even in the 10 top jobs for women, females earn less than men; only one career (speech pathology), pays the same regardless of gender
What feminists want the world to know, or at least acknowledge, is the different ways men and women are treated. Although great strides have been taken towards equality, women and men are far from playing on the same field

So please remember these next time you judge someone based off their feminism, or even just make sure you know what it means before you believe in something. It’s very important to know the facts before you try to debate them with someone because every belief is based off of facts and is not something to be taken lightly.

Women’s rights have come a long way from the past, but there is still a long way to go. There are some people saying that feminism isn’t going to change anything, and I feel sorry for the lack of faith in their small brains. Change doesn’t just happen. You have to fight for it. If there’s something you want to be different, sitting there wishing it’s going to happen isn’t going to change anything.

The women’s march that took place on January 21 is one of the best things I’ve ever seen in history. All over the world, not just in America, women AND men marched to protest Donald Trump and stand up for their rights as human beings. Even though Trump was already successfully in office when the march took place, that didn’t stop people for letting him know about the rights they deserve, and I think that is so important.

Our nation is constantly changing, just like the people living in it. Barack Obama was our first African American, and I think the United States is ready for our first woman president. Did I think Hillary Clinton deserved the honor of being our first woman president? Absolutely not. My views on the election are very complicated, but I think what happened is what God intended to happen and people need to give the president a change before jumping to unrealistic conclusions about what will happen to our country. We can’t change anything until we open our minds and hearts to accepting other people.

So to sum things up, I think our country is still growing, and has much more room to grow over time. I think equality is something many people will realize America needs more of, and the fight for equal rights will be won in many years to come. For now we must accept what has happened and embrace it as something that will change us and our country for the better.

freedom

Freedom

January 19, 2017

Today I wanted to touch on somewhat of a lighter topic than my previous posts. I realize that I can be a very dark and emotional person (because 99.9% of the time I am), and not everyone likes to read that stuff, so today I want to talk about the freedom we have.

The inspiration of this post comes from the fact that I just finished my World History lesson for the day, which has been growing more and more depressing by the day. Today I read about the Great Terror (for those who aren’t familiar, the Great Terror took went down in 1937 and 1938 in Russia under the rule of Joseph Stalin who followed the ideas of Communism and punished anyone who dared to go against him. Similar to Adolf Hitler’s persecution of the Jews in Germany). And I couldn’t help but think about the wonderful freedom we have here in America.

Going back to the Great Terror (I might ramble about it because I’m a big History person), it’s hard to believe that millions of innocent people died in what was called the Gulag System, a prison labor camp where millions were worked to death with little or no food and water, not to mention the freezing conditions in Siberia where most of these camps were located. Some of these people had a right to be there. They were real criminals who had committed crimes such as murder and deserved to be there. But most were innocent people such as farmers who wouldn’t give their crops to the government as Stalin had demanded. They barely had enough food to provide for their families and were not about to give it up to the government.

Why am I telling you all this sad and depressing History? Well, I would hope that you already were thankful to live in a free country like America, but if you weren’t, I hope that this information makes you even more grateful. Now obviously America, just like any other country, has experienced hardships as well, but none nowhere as near as bad as Russia, Germany, and many others. We have been given rights here in America, such as the freedom of speech and the freedom for each person to choose their religion.

Tomorrow (Friday, January 20) is Inauguration Day, the second reason why I chose to write about this. Donald J. Trump will take the oath of office and become the next President of the United States. I’m not going to go into politics right now because I’m so done with talking about it and if you know me, you already know my opinion (but let me know if you want another post on politics because I’d be more than happy to write it). Anyway, back to what I was saying. Some people are upset about the results of the election, but please remember that we are still a country. We are still united under the Constitution and no president can ever change that.

History shapes us. It makes us who we are today. We as humans are meant to make mistakes, and also to learn something from them. I say this all the time, but there IS a reason for everything. Things don’t just happen with no explanation. Sometimes it is meant for us to know the explanation, other times we will never know. All I can say is that the future of this country is not in the hands of the President. Our country was founded on the grounds of Christianity. Whether you choose to believe or not is something only you can decide, but Christians know that God has a plan for this country, as well as every other country on Earth and no person can ever change that.

consequences

Forgiveness and First Impressions

January 16, 2017

This wasn’t at all what I was planning on writing about today, but it’s something I really need to talk about so I decided to talk about it today. There are a lot of things going on in my mind right now, but I told myself I’m not going to overwhelm you by talking about a whole bunch of things at once so I’m going to start with the most important.

Think about meeting someone for the first time. What’s the first thing you notice about the person you’re meeting? Most people would say hair color, whether the person is short or tall, and the kind of voice they speak in, things like that. And typically those are the things I notice too. But I am a person of detail, and I take in everything I possibly can about the person I’m meeting. Sometimes I can even tell how much I’m going to like them just by the way they act around me. It’s all about the details.

I once met someone, and from the moment we locked eyes, I knew nothing would ever be the same after I met them. And I was right. Not too long ago I met someone, and I loathed them from the second they spoke. But then there’s a plot twist. As I get to know them, the loathing starts to fade. Some would even say I was beginning to grow fond of them. As the fondness grew, I found myself wondering if I had made a mistake in my first impressions of them.

And then the warnings came. I could never understand how what they were saying could be right. I mean, I thought I knew this person pretty well. But obviously not well enough. Now let me tell you, every person on earth is human, and humans make mistakes. Sometimes big mistakes. And some of them deserve to be forgiven, some do not. If you’ve done something terrible and recognize that you’ve made a mistake, you should be forgiven. Correct? Well what if you make a mistake and DON’T recognize it as a mistake? Do you still deserve to be forgiven by your peers?

Many would say yes, God wants you to forgive everyone, right? But forgiveness is a tricky thing. If someone makes a mistake and knows that they’ll automatically be forgiven every time, what’s to stop them from making the mistake again? Someday you have to learn. And that’s where consequences come in. Consequences are a part of life, and everything we do comes with a consequence. Sometimes the consequences can be small, little things. Other times they can be a lot bigger.

It’s hard to believe you can think you know someone so well, and then suddenly learn something about them that changes everything. Maybe your first impressions were right after all, and maybe you should have stuck to them. But no, you were too nice of a person for that. So now you must decide if you are to forgive them. Do they really deserve it?

“I lay awake all night wondering how this could all be true. How could you do something so horribly wrong and not even recognize it? I can’t help but wonder, was I to be your next victim? Your next trophy to add to your collection of people you’ve ruined. All this time I’ve trusted you, I trusted that you were a better person than that. And you have no shame? You feel no guilt? How are you even human if you sin in the face of the Father and not be on your knees begging for His forgiveness?”

-My thoughts at 2 A.M.

Never assume you know someone as well as you think you know them.

change

Change

January 09, 2017

Since it’s the beginning of a new year, I felt it fitting to talk about change. Some people welcome change into their lives, while others find it hard to accept it (such as myself). If you’ve been wearing your hair the same way for four years, why would you want to change that if it’s what you like and what you’re used to? Probably because you don’t realize how much a change is needed. It never hurts to branch out and try something new every once and awhile.

Change has never been easy for me, but I can certainly say it’s taught me a lot in my life. Fortunately, God decides when it’s time for a change, because otherwise I wouldn’t be where I am today. I love my routines and habits so much, that I don’t even realize how bad they may be. Or maybe they’re not necessarily bad, it’s just time to grow out of them and try something different.

And not all changes will be good. Sometimes it’s hard to understand why things happen the way they do, but you just have to remember that there is a reason for it, even if the reason isn’t clear in the beginning. Maybe moving to another state and to a different school isn’t what you desired, but maybe it was time to experience new things and meet new people.

Nothing here on earth is permanent. I hate to break it to you, but nothing lasts forever. Things are always going to be constantly changing. People are going to come and go from your life, because people and their feelings are constantly changing as well. Someone you love today may not be the person you’ll love in five years. Your teacher may decide teaching just isn’t her thing anymore, and she wants to try a different occupation.

So you see, you can’t hold onto things forever. You can squeeze it in your hands as tight as you can, but it will eventually slip away. And there’s absolutely nothing you can do about it. You just have to accept that it wasn’t meant for you anymore and you’ll come across something better. That is the pattern of life. If there wasn’t change and everything stayed the same, no one would ever learn anything. We wouldn’t be wise. We would just keep making the same mistakes over and over again because we wouldn’t know any different.

Change is hard. But no one said life was going to be easy. The things we experience daily can change our lives for better or for worse, but with every change comes a reason and a lesson for it that will, in the end, make you a wiser person if you choose to learn from it.

friends

We Meet Again

January 05, 2017

“Hi Megan."

“Hi.”

The first words we spoke to each other face to face in eight months. Definitely not the reunion I had expected. But what was I expecting? Us to run into each other’s arms and say how much we had missed each other? No. Just no. That’s not how this works. You see, being former friends and once-upon-a-time lovers, our story is very….complicated, to say the least.

I froze when he spoke to me. Eight months and that’s how you great me? The last time we saw each other I fell asleep in your lap, not knowing that it would be the last precious moments we would spend together for a very long time. And just “hi”? Maybe he was as shocked as I was. Maybe that’s why I wanted to say more, but I didn’t because it felt like everything had stopped and it was just my brain screaming at me.

You loved him.

He left you.

You still loved him.

He did some terrible things.

You forgave him over and over.

He supported you.

You ignored him.

He loved you.

You blocked him from your life.

And I thought that would be the end. Until now. My brain kept wrestling like that and finally I ran to the bathroom. I slumped down the wall and lay on the floor, breathing heavily. It really is him. Why did he have to come here? Why?

It saddens me to think that we can have people in our lives that are so important to us, and then one day they become nothing to you. You did everything together. You stabbed each other in the back a million times, but you still loved one another. And now they’re doing the things they did with you with someone new. You’ve been replaced in their heart but maybe they haven’t been replaced in yours. And that may just be the hardest thing a human being will ever experience.

They grew up without you. And you’re still young and stuck in the past. Hungover on the memories that don’t even matter anymore. In fact, the other person hardly remembers. To them, you’re just a fragment of their memory of the past. Maybe you weren’t as important to them as you thought you were.

The worst part is when you finally move on and realize you can live without them. You can breathe one breath without thinking of them, you can do all the things you did with them by yourself now. You can pull yourself out of bed in the mornings without their encouragement. And then it hits you. You don’t need them anymore. Just like a baby who no longer needs its parents to stand up. You can live without them.

Now if you’re a stubborn person, you know you’ll never truly move on. You know you’ll never really forget them like you say you have. You may have put their picture in a drawer, but you take it out and admire it every once in a while. Marvel over how young you were, and when love was all just a game. Maybe they’ll visit you in your dreams at night, and you’ll be able to see them once again and be kids just one more time. Or maybe years from now, when you’re married with a kid or two, you’ll hear a knock on your door and open it to find them standing on your front porch and they’ll ask to come in. Maybe this isn’t the end.

Starting Over (again)

January 04, 2017

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The Secrets to Being Independent

Feminism and Equality

Freedom

Forgiveness and First Impressions

Change

We Meet Again

Starting Over (again)

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