Experiencing A Global Pandemic: surviving the crisis + the impact on mental health

I never in a million years thought I would be experiencing something like this.  When I was younger, my biggest fears were getting kidnapped, my house catching on fire, and missing my favorite TV show.  Now, I’m currently living with the biggest fear I never knew I had: a global pandemic.

My brain is trying to comprehend everything.  How this situation evolved to what it is currently.  The first time I remember even hearing someone mention the word “coronavirus” was probably back in January, when the news first broke about the outbreak in China.  To be honest, I was one who thought maybe it would just stay over there and be merely some “foreign disease.”  I was wrong.  It didn’t take long for this thing to find its way into our country’s borders.  That was when I knew it wouldn’t be long before it came to my state.  And it did.  It continued to spread and become the crisis it is now.

I have never seen gas prices so low.

I have never seen so many of my favorite places close their doors.

I have never seen the shelves at the grocery store so empty.

I have never seen people fight over toilet paper.

I have never seen so many lives turned upside down.

But this is our new reality- for the next few weeks, months, and possibly years.

As a side note, being a business student, I am quite intrigued with how this pandemic will affect the economy in the years to come.  But I am not here to talk about the economic impact of this situation.  Maybe the next post will be about economics, but right now I want to talk about mental health.  Mine and yours.  For some of us, this is going to take a huge toll on our mental health over the next few weeks.  I personally am not one who is easy going when it comes to change.  Change is my worst enemy and I have been fighting it for the last several months as I adjust to the new lifestyle I have.  Now I must fight it in the face of a global pandemic.

It feels as though everything is turned upside down.  I cannot go to work, I cannot go to school, I cannot see my friends and the people I love the most.  It’s hard to believe this is a new reality for all of us.  What scares me the most is how long it is going to last.  Already it’s been months, and the virus does not show signs of slowing down anytime soon.  I hope and pray that is gone by the time summer comes around, but everything is so uncertain right now.  That’s another thing that is making me anxious- the uncertainty of the situation.  I feel very nervous and worried not knowing what might happen next.  I keep telling myself that it cannot possibly get any worse, but we have been warned the worst is still yet to come.

However, despite these thoughts and fears, I am still holding onto a thread of hope.  There is always a light at the end of the tunnel.  In the meantime, I want to share with you guys some of the things I have been doing while being self-quarantined.

1.  Get up at your usual time

Sleeping in is actually not good for your body.  Get enough rest, but try to get up early and start your day as you normally would

2.  Get ready for the day

This was a big one for me.  I have found that I feel better if I still get dressed and do my makeup and hair as I would if I was going out for the day. 

3.  Work on projects you didn’t have time to do before

Now that you have all the time in the world, pick up a new hobby or do a house project you’ve been wanting to do for a while.  I’ve been using this time to work on my blog and YouTube channel (subscribe for quarantine vlogs.)

4.  Get outside

As long as you social distance yourself from anyone you may encounter, getting outdoors will help unleash those stuffy feelings and allow you some fresh air.

5.  Reflect

I’ve been taking this time to look back on the last several months and evaluate some things I need to work on as well as applaud myself for the good changes I’ve made.  Use this time away from other people to work on and take good care of yourself.

I hope this was helpful to some of you who may be experiencing the same feelings I am.  I hope that we will all be able to return to normalcy soon; but in the meantime, wash your hands, stay home, and stay healthy.

Hi there, welcome back to the blog!

            Today I’m back with another part of #HowISurvivedHighSchool.  I’d like to know, are you guys enjoying it?  Is there anything specific you’d like me to talk about at some point during the series?  Leave me a comment or connect with me on social media and let me know.  Also, if you aren’t caught up with the first two parts, I’ll link them here:

As always, I’m going to copy and paste the “rules” I posted in the first post.  It’s important for me to mention them every time because I don’t want anything I say here to be taken out of context. 

1.  This is a 6 week series and a new part will be posted each Wednesday (so mark your calendars.)

2.  I am NOT here to call anyone out or speak poorly of anyone I’ve encountered throughout my High School career.  That’s not my vibe and my intentions of writing these posts are to encourage; not to bring anyone down.

3.  I will be talking about certain people I’ve encountered and things I’ve experienced, but please know that NO NAMES will be mentioned; if a name has to be used it will be changed.

4.  All the things I am going to tell you are true and are my stories that I have a right to tell.

5.  Please read/listen with open ears and hearts.

6.  Some of the topics I will be discussing are mature and very series at times so if you can’t handle the intensity, please feel free to click out at any time.

So today I wanted to talk about a very important part of high school: friends.  Friends play a very significant role in your life so I think it’s important to build ones that last.  Unfortunately I’ve had very little luck with that, especially in high school, and I’ve learned that most people are going to come and go out of your life but there will always be those few people who come into your life and stay for a long time.

I remember at the end of 8^th grade I saw this post online and it said “the people you hang out with in middle school aren’t going to be around for all of high school” and now at the end of high school I can fully confirm that saying is 100% true.  During high school everyone goes through so many changes and sometimes people don’t change with you.  Furthermore, high school is vastly different from middle school; it’s almost like a totally different world.  Everyone is basically trying to figure out themselves and who they are as a person.  Sometimes this creates tension in your relationships.

So in high school there are these things called “cliques.”  What that is essentially is a group of people that gravitate towards each other in large groups.  In a sociology class I took a while back, we learned that people with similar personalities tend to form these cliques.  However, from what I’ve seen, cliques are just another way to stereotype.  You’ll see where this information comes into play when it comes to friendships in a moment.

Something I haven’t talked about much on here is my experience at co-op.  Some of you probably don’t know what it is, so I’ll explain quickly.  What it is basically is a group of homeschool families that meets weekly to have classes like art, science, and drama, in addition to the work at home.  I was involved in my co-op for 8 years.  Looking back, there were a few pleasant memories made, but for me it was just not a good environment for me to grow up in.  Out of all the people that were there and friends I made, on this current day I am not in contact with any of them.  I’ll get to why in a bit.

In my grade there were 3 cliques.  The first one was made up of the “popular” kids, if you will.  The second group was the kids who were the quiet, more introverted ones and the last group were the kids with disabilities.  It sounds so stereotypical, but for the purpose of this post you need to know.  As the years went on and we got older, it only became more stereotypical.  In the beginning it was easy to do group activities because everyone talked to everyone, but the “popular group” only became more distant from everyone else.

You might be wondering where I fit into these groups.  To be honest, I really didn’t fit into any of them; I just bounced around between all three because I really tried to get along with everyone.  My longtime best friend was in the popular group so I spent a lot of time with them, but I didn’t really fit in with them and was often left out or in the back of the group.  No big deal at first, I still hung around the other groups.

Then something happened in summer of 2014 that changed the course of my friendships with these people.  I’m not going to take the time to explain what happened, but long story short me and one of the populars had a very public falling out on social media.  It resulted in most people taking sides, and everyone pretty much took this other girl’s side.  The situation itself is not significant anymore but the tension never left. Life went on though, this girl and I never reconciled (even after I made 2 attempts) but everyone else seemed to get along just fine.

There were some big problems with these people.  The popular ones.  There is a reason I eventually chose to distance myself from them.  At co-op they were constantly having attitudes, making unkind remarks to other students, and just flat out acting stuck-up.  There is no better word for it.  There were major bullying issues and the adults did next to nothing about it.  Some of them even contributed to the problems.  People were skipping out of gym because the teacher always favorited the populars and the other kids weren’t treated fairly.  Some of the behavior I witnessed from these kids makes me sick to my stomach to this day whenever I think about it.  One time, one of the said popular kids said to my friend (and I quote) “I’m better than you.”  I’m.better.than.you.  No other context, just “I’m better than you.”  I will never be able to erase that from my mind.  And her attitude that came with it, her parents should be ashamed. 

One thing I’ve learned after all these years is that sometimes you don’t realize how badly you’re being treated until that person is out of your life.  The way things ended with these people was far from good terms, but I’m so happy they are out of my life because I have people in my life now that made me realize how bad these people were for me.  I haven’t spoken to these people in two years.  However, I have ran into them a few times in public since then and I have to say, for people who proudly call themselves “Christians”, their behavior towards me was far from Christian like.  Little or no eye contact, pretending I’m not even there at all, not even a wave or smile.  It’s really hard to believe they were what I once called my best friends.

After going through a very, very dark and scary period of my life in 2017, things finally started to look up.  I wasn’t feeling depressed anymore, I actually wanted to leave my house, and I met some new amazing people who have changed my life.  People who genuinely care about me, make time to spend with me, and aren’t ashamed to be seen with me.  They helped me get to a better place in my life and allow me to be myself.  I thank God for giving me the strength to let the bad ones go and for bringing better people into my life.

There’s a quote by Alexander Graham Bell that I think beautifully illustrate this: “When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.”   I like to remind myself of this whenever a relationship ends or an opportunity falls through.  There is always a reason and most of the time it’s because God is making room for bigger and better things.  So if things aren’t going well right now, just remember that it could be a sign that there are better things coming.

I want to be completely honest with you for a moment.  I recently celebrated my graduation (which I’ll be talking about in an upcoming post) and I had three friends show up.  Now I had plenty of other people too, but my point is, you can have all the friends in the world but out of all those there will only be a few real ones.  I didn’t even think about the people who didn’t come because I’m thankful I have three really good friends that took the time to celebrate my graduation with me.  I’d take that over having many fake friends any day.

So if you take away anything from this post, here’s three main points I want you to remember.  First, don’t hangout where you know you don’t fit in.  Second, let go of those unhealthy relationships in your life!  Remember, when a door closes another one opens.  Third, value your close friends.  They are the ones that are going to be around for a long time. 

I’m currently running on four hours of sleep so I’m only half awake right now but I wanted to write this now before I lost all my thoughts about last night. 

Prom is truly an amazing experience.  Just the fact that I’m able to go as a homeschooler is pretty cool because it’s something I never expected to be able to do.  I get a lot of questions about things like prom, homecoming, and other formal school events and if I’m allowed to go.  Don’t quote me on this, but I am almost positive that where I live I could possibly attend a public school event if I was invited by someone who goes to the school.

But what really is the fun of that?   What if your school didn’t have a prom and you had to go to another school’s prom just to be able to go.  It’s not the same.  That’s why I’m extremely lucky to be able to go to this event.  As you might already know, I went last year for the first time and absolutely loved it.  So ever since this time last year I’ve been counting down the days until I could go again.  And that day was yesterday.

Dress

            Okay so one of the biggest parts of prom (for a girl) is the dress you wear.  You want it to be something that suits you, fits you, meets the dress code, and something you can dance in.  Do you know how hard it is to find all those things in one dress?  Not to mention one that’s in your price range.  This year I had a much more difficult time picking out a dress and it was actually my mom who found the dress I ended up wearing (thanks mom).  I was not impressed with it when I first saw it, but it grew on me as time went on (literally and figuratively).

            The style is a little more different, which is why it took me some time to get used to it, but by the time prom rolled around I was in love with it.  It was exactly the color I wanted and it with a few alterations, fit me perfectly.  I got it on sale for only $75 online (which is very inexpensive for a formal dress)  and a huge thank you to my grandma for buying it for me!

Here’s the link to the dress: 

https://www.jcpenney.com/p/city-triangle-prom-sleeveless-ball-gown-juniors/ppr5007434985?

Hair and Makeup

If I’ve never told you about my hair, you’re about to hear about it now.  But seriously, I have the most awful hair.  I’ve never liked it.  It’s always oily and greasy no matter how many times I wash it or don’t wash it, it’s very thin so it’s very hard to style (that’s why in all my pictures it’s just down and straightened which is pretty much the only thing I can do with it).  So if you have any suggestions on hair care, please let me know.

As I was looking for inspiration for a prom hairstyle, I was sad because all the girls that were wearing the hairstyles had really good and thick hair, unlike mine.  But in the end it all worked out and my best friend’s sister was able to work some magic with this mane of mine.

For makeup I wanted something simple but elegant at the same time, and I think it came out very well.  For my eyes I wanted the colors to match my dress so I had gold and then a bit of a plum color in the corner.  There wasn’t a lot of time for makeup so I wasn’t able to have a full face, but for what we did have time for it turned out perfect.

Date

This year, my lovely best friend agreed to be my date to prom.  Or I shouldn’t say she agreed, rather I “dragged her along”.  This year was definitely better in terms of who I spent the evening with.  As I like to think of it, it’s better to have one real friend than a lot of fake ones.  Over the past year I’ve stepped out of my comfort zone to meet new people and have some incredible new people in my life, but also cut the line on some not-so-good ones. 

Some people have asked me recently when I’ll date again, and the truthful answer is that whenever God brings me the right person at the right time.  As I’ve said in a few posts before, the waiting game is one that is hard and tiring sometimes, but I know it will be completely worth it one day.  Even if that day is not soon.  Until then, I’m surrounded with the most amazing friends, girls and boys that I am incredibly thankful for.

I’m getting sidetracked already.  Back to prom.

Dinner

            Unlike most proms, this prom serves a three-course meal before the dancing.  I think this is one of the things that make this prom unique, because from what I’ve heard, most school proms don’t serve food.  This year’s meal consisted of: a salad, stuffed chicken, sauteed peppers, broccoli, bread, and a brownie for dessert. It was delicious!

            There is only one complaint I had about the dinner and it may be partially my fault.  There was no initiative on when we should eat the dessert (that has already been set out on the tables when we arrived).  We knew it wasn’t meant to be eaten until after dinner, but we weren’t sure when.  After we did a few dances, we came back to our table and it had already been taken away, along with our water glasses.  So we never got to eat dessert!  But other than that, the meal was fantastic.

Dancing

The dancing.  Perhaps the best and most anticipated part of prom. Another unique thing about this prom is that they don’t just play music from the past decade.  We did dances that originated back in the Revolutionary War period, such as The Grand March and The Virginia Reel.  That makes it unique and interesting for everyone and provides a general structure for the dances, which is nice.

There is also a DJ that plays songs that are a bit more recent.  Before prom you can send in requests of songs you’d like to be played and the DJ might play it at prom.  One thing I noticed is that they played a lot of the same songs as last year, but I suppose that’s because there are only so many they can play that are clean and acceptable.  Not a complaint, just something I thought would be worth mentioning.  Overall, the dancing is a lot of fun, especially with the mix of old and new style dances. 

The Second Time Around

Prom is five hours long, but not nearly long enough.  This time when I left I was sad, knowing I only have one more time to go back.   I do have to say that my second prom experience was a lot more different than the first one.  Last year I had mixed feelings about going and ended up being pleasantly surprised.  This year, I knew more of what to expect but I didn’t really get the “pleasantly surprised” vibes as last year.

            To sum things up, junior prom was a fantastic.  These kinds of memories are memories I’ll keep with me for a long, long time.  There’s only so much time to be young, and as I always say “you only live once” (seriously, I don’t get why people don’t say that more often).  Prom is truly a wonderful experience I’ll forever be grateful for.

Love Part Two: Friendships

“Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.” Proverbs 13:20

Welcome back!  As you probably already know, today I’ll be continuing my series on love with part two.  If you missed last week’s post, check it out here.

Last week I went over some things about what this series is, defined love as put in the dictionary, and talked about loving family.  Today we’re going to continue along those same lines, but today we’re going to talk about your friendships.

In case you forgot, I’ll go ahead and insert the dictionary definition of love again.

Love- an intense feeling of deep affection

Of course one of the things we’ll be doing throughout all of these posts is to not only look at what the dictionary and society say about love, but see what God’s Word says.  And maybe by the end you’ll even have your own definition of love.

Mark 12:31 says “love your neighbor as yourself”.  Neighbor means your peers, the people around you.  When we love other Christians around us, that means we are loving our brothers and sisters in Christ, which pleases God.  It’s important to build friendships with good people.  If we surround ourselves with good company, that will make a more positive impact on your life and you’ll be much happier. 

Some people make friends easier than others.  For me, making friends has never been easy.  I’m a very shy and reserved person, not outgoing like others.  But one thing I’ve learned is that it doesn’t take a lot to make a friend.  Sure, it does involve stepping out of your comfort zone a little, but let me tell you a little story.  So about a year ago, I was at youth group and we divided up into small groups of about five or six people.  In my group one night we were going around and introducing ourselves and after I introduced myself this girl looked at me and said “you’re really really pretty”.  Ever since that compliment, we’ve been friends.

You don’t have to think of a super impressive thing to say to someone.  It can just be something simple like “hi, I love your hair”.  I think sometimes we overthink and it prevents us from talking to people because we can’t think of something really good to say.  Another thing I’ve learned when trying to make friends is to make yourself approachable.  When you surround yourself with people you already know, there’s a less likely chance that someone new is going to talk to you because they assume you already have your group of friends.

I like going places by myself.  I’ve found that by going alone, it reduces the stress of having to “impress” your friend or whoever you’re usually with, and it makes you more open to other people around you.  It takes some getting used to, but you’d be surprised what all you miss when you’re busy with other people.

So enough about making friends, let’s talk about keeping them.  This is the real key to having good friends, because you want friendships that will last, right?  As I said before, positive things come from being around positive and uplifting people.  Believe it or not, friendships can be just as toxic as some relationships if you “hang out with the wrong crowd”.  But if you have good, positive people as friends then this part should be a breeze.

The most important part of a friendship is to talk.  All the time.  About everything.  Okay maybe not everything, but keeping secrets that you’ve told someone else from your friends is what leads to those dreaded fights.  I think communication is the most important thing when it comes to friendships.  If you don’t communicate properly with your friends, you’ll eventually lose connection with them and they’ll drift away which is pretty sad.

The last thing is to tell them how much you appreciate them.  By letting them know how much you appreciate them being in your life, it shows them that you still care and are making an effort to keep the friendship lasting and going strong.  I’m really bad at this sometimes because I tend to get upset whenever someone isn’t talking to me as much and I wonder why but then I remember that to keep any friendship strong, you have to let the person know that you still value the friendship.  Even if that means texting them first (which is something I literally hate doing), or getting over your pride and being the one to step up and say “hey I just wanted to let you know how much I value you as a friend”.

God told us to love others as He loved us (John 15:12).  He told us to walk with the wise, and forgive others if you have grievances against them.  Obviously it’s hard to top God’s love for us, but if we clothe ourselves in compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience (Colossians 3:12-14), we attract people of the same character.  That’s the real truth to making and keeping friends.

ONE YEAR OF BLOGGING

Today is a very exciting day.  Why is it a very exciting day?  Well because today marks exactly one year since I published my first post on my blog! I’ve come a long way in just a year, and I’m honestly so proud of myself for accomplishing so much in just 365 days.

Background:

You might not know this, but before my blog, I used this website for the music I used to write and record.  Looking back now it was honestly pretty embarrassing, but it’s what got me started.  After not recording any more music or posting on my website, I started tossing around the idea of turning it into a blog.  I already knew I loved to write, and people liked what I wrote so I thought what if I had a place to share it with everyone?  I wanted to reach people beyond just my family and friends, people who may be going through things and needed someone to relate to.  That’s what I wanted to do with my blog.

How the blog got its name:

Next you might be wondering how I came up with the name “Beauty in This Brokenness”.  This was a concept I had been thinking about for a long time before I even thought about starting a blog.  The idea I had was originally for an album I started to write a long time ago (which obviously never came to be), and it was about seeing light in times of darkness.  That was what I wanted my blog to be based on.  To share my stories and maybe inspire some people along the way.

What is this blog about?:

I don’t classify my blog under any certain “niche” (as people in the blogging groups on Facebook say).  What I mean by that is some people write blogs about lifestyle, some are about travel, some are about addiction recovery.  There are endless possibilities of what a blog can be about.  Usually when you go to a blog, you can find out what a blog is about by looking at either the title or the tagline.  But for me, I didn’t want to limit myself to one topic.  I didn’t want to feel like I couldn’t write about food because my blog was about photography.  That’s why my tagline is “just me talking about……well basically everything”.  If you do come here looking for something specific, that’s why I created the “tags” section on the bottom right hand side of the screen.  If you click on one of the words, it will show you all the posts related to that topic.

Challenges:

There are plenty of challenges that come with blogging.  Just like with anything you do in life, people are going to criticize you.  One of the best things about my first year of blogging is that I haven’t received a lot of negative criticism.  Most people are very supportive and I’ve gotten good feedback from other bloggers as well.  There have been times when others don’t always agree with what I have to say (I mean, the only reason why my abortion post is one of the most popular posts is because I used it in a debate on Facebook), but these days you can’t say anything without making someone angry.  That’s why I’ve learned not to take the negative responses I get too seriously because there is always going to be someone that doesn’t like you or doesn’t agree with you and I’m perfectly okay with that.  But I’m not going to change myself to please others.

Being your own boss is hard.  There’s no one to tell you what to do or when to post, so it can be easy to slack off.  That’s probably been the biggest challenge I've faced over the past year.  I tend to lack skills in the motivation department because I get distracted or lazy too easily.  When I first started my blog, my “schedule” was to post something on my blog twice a week.  For someone that still has school and other tasks, it proved to be very difficult to keep up with.  After I struggled with posting for a few months, I decided I don’t need a schedule.  When I feel inspired to write and post something, I do it; whenever that may be.  I’ve learned that it motivates me so much more than trying to stick to a schedule.  Lately I’ve been trying to post twice a month, but sometimes it doesn’t always work out.   If you follow me on social media (@beautyinthisbrokenness), I always let you know when I posted something new.  Or you can sign up for email updates on the right hand side of the screen.

What’s to come:

I have so many things I want to do with my blog.  I’m always trying to create good content and reach more and more people.  I now have over 100 views on two of my posts and over 2,600 views over the whole year.  That’s crazy to me.  When I started out, there were only about 15-20 people reading my posts and now there’s anywhere from 60-100.  Those are big numbers to me.  I remember when I got excited because 12 people listened to my song on Soundcloud three years ago.  My goal is to get those numbers even higher for next year.  But of course numbers mean little to me because the only reason it’s possible to reach those numbers is because of you.  I wouldn’t even be sitting here writing this if it weren’t for you.

Another goal I have is to self-host my own website.  For all of you that aren’t geeks like I am, what I mean is that I want the url to say “beautyinthisbrokenness.com”, instead of “blogspot.com” at the end.  Blogger has been so awesome because it’s free and simple to use.  Being a student with little funds, it will definitely be awhile, but one day I hope to create my own site.  I also want to collaborate with other bloggers and have guest posts.  I think it would be a lot of fun, but I still need to work my way up a little more before I can do that.  Those are just a few of the things I would love to see happen in the future (hopefully not that far off).

Lastly, I just want to take a minute to thank each and every person who has even clicked on the link to my blog.  I am so thankful for all the support I have received, and like I said before none of this would even be possible without you.  Thank you for an amazing first year of blogging and I can’t wait to see what this new year brings.

You wouldn’t believe the reaction you get when you’re a Christian and you tell another Christian that you don’t attend church on a regular basis.  Seriously, it’s like a kid telling another kid that they don’t go to school.  They give you this really strange look, like “are you sure you’re even a Christian”?  Yes I’m a Christian, no I’m not a perfect Christian, yes I pray everyday, yes I read the Bible as often as I can, but no, I don’t go to church.

I have a bad history with churches, okay?

Actually, I have a bad history with the people in those churches.  But that’s not what I’m here to talk about today, so we’ll save those stories for another time.

I heard a sermon a few months back when I was visiting a church one Sunday that really got to me.  It was about the barriers that keep people from coming to church and being Christians, and one of the things the pastor talked about was a survey that a Christian author had done, and here are some of the things those people said in the survey about Christians:

Christians are:

First I have to take a second to laugh at the “too political” part, because I think everyone already knows that Christians can be a little bit too political, if there is such a thing these days because isn't everyone too political?

The whole time I was listening to this sermon, I was thinking about how everything the pastor said were things that I have been trying to prove my whole life.

Let me pause and just make it clear that I do not hate other Christians.  1 John 4:11 says, “dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another."  I do, however, believe that Christians should always set a good examples, in a way like how older siblings should be a good examples to their younger siblings.

I see so many good examples of Christians, yet so many ones that do not present the character of what God expects of a Christian.  According to the Bible, Christians should be:

So, with all that being said, let me get back to what this post is actually about.  Do you have to go to church to be a Christian?  Or rather, is it a requirement?

There are two answers to this question.  By society’s standards, yes.  But does the Bible say it is required?  Well it’s not in the 10 Commandments, which are the guidelines to every Christian’s life.  But the Bible does encourage going to church in several passages, such as Ephesians 4:16 which says, “for whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love.”

The key point in that passage is the body, the church is supposed to build itself in love.  The problem with churches these days is that there are some that do not build themselves up in love, because in order for the church body to work properly, every person must be building up other members of the body.  Other members of the body means, of course, Christians.  If we do not build each other up in love, the church cannot function.

I’ve seen it happen.

Finding a church is often like finding a house, it can be a very discouraging and difficult process to find “the perfect church”.  I know for me it has been very frustrating and difficult when people ask me why I don’t go to church, or tell me why I should.  Again, by society’s standards it is apparently a requirement that if you are a Christian, you must attend church regularly.

But for now, I can respond to anyone that asks me about church with: “I just haven’t found the right one”, and you can too if you are currently facing this situation.  But never give up hope, because the perfect church is out there, you just haven’t found it yet.

                First of all, hello, yes I know it’s been awhile.  Sometimes life just throws a lot of things at you at once and it’s hard to handle them all.  I’d just like to say that I’m sorry for not posting as often, but I do plan on continuing this for as long as I possibly can.  I may not post every week like I originally said, but there will still be posts!  Also, if you’re interested in writing or co-writing a post, please contact me with your ideas!!  I’d love to have some help!  With all that being said, here’s the real post:

“In the end, we only regret the chances we didn’t take, the relationships we were afraid to have, and the decisions we waited too long to make”

                That, my friends, is a quote from the amazing Lewis Carroll and has a lot to do with what I want to talk about today.  A good friend recently told me, “we’ve all had bad things happen to us in our past.  But letting that cloud your judgement  about someone new and interesting would be really unfair to you and the other person”.  And unfortunately, I am guilty of doing just that.  Letting my past and others dictate what I should think about a new person.

                Here’s a short example: there was this person I saw every week, but in a crowded place.  They talked to me a few times and asked a lot of questions about who I am and what I do.  The first time I didn’t really think much of it, if anything I thought it was a bit weird.  But fast forward to a few weeks later and I sit next to this person who starts asking me a lot of questions.  When they said they already knew some things about me, I was surprised at first.  It was not until after I left that I realized those two people were the same person.  On an even sadder note, I won’t ever see them again.

                There are two things wrong with that story.  Number one, I can’t ever remember people I’ve only talked to once.  So if you meet me for the first time, I guarantee that I’ll forget your name in five minutes.  I don’t know why, because usually I have a pretty good memory.  Second, I had an opportunity to know someone and I didn’t even take it.  And now I wish I had.  Actually I really wished I had asked them as many questions as they asked me because now I’m stuck with regret and the guilt of not being polite.

                There is a good, solid reason for everyone who comes into your life.  Nothing is an accident.  If you have the chance to go out and meet new people, take it!  God put them in your path for a reason.  As always, the reason may not always be clear but if you ever have the chance to help someone out or talk to them, don’t hesitate.  This is how people meet their best friends and soulmates.  You aren’t going to get very far in life if you only talk to three people.  We all have that bubble, a zone where we feel comfortable and people we feel comfortable with.  But if we live in that bubble, are we ever going to see some of the amazing things the world has to offer?

                I’ve always been one to try new things by myself.  I just never really saw the point of dragging five other people with you if the point of going to that new place is to meet people and try new things.  Maybe this will end the problem of cliques.  If people only knew how many more awesome people there are in the world, maybe they wouldn’t stick to their favorites. 

                One of the reasons I started this blog was to reach people everywhere and to send out positive messages that will impact people’s lives.  One thing I highly encourage is thinking outside the box.  Don’t be afraid to step outside of what you know for something that may just change your life for the better.  I know it takes a lot of courage, but just think of that time when you tried a new food you were nervous about trying and ended up liking.  That’s how these things work.  Lots of courage, but it may help you out in the end.

                As I was writing this, I thought of a song I want you to hear.  This was one of my favorite songs when I was younger, and it has a great message about stepping out to help someone.

•         Feminism is defined as the belief in social, political, and economic equality of the sexes
•         The goal of feminism is to challenge the systemic inequalities women face on a daily basis
•         Contrary to popular belief, feminism has nothing to do with belittling men. In fact feminism does not support sexism against either gender.  Feminism works towards equality, not female superiority
•         Even in the 10 top jobs for women, females earn less than men; only one career (speech pathology), pays the same regardless of gender
•         What feminists want the world to know, or at least acknowledge, is the different ways men and women are treated.  Although great strides have been taken towards equality, women and men are far from playing on the same field