Megan Dennis: lessons

A College Life Update

October 28, 2019

I wish every week was fall break.

Unfortunately, it’s only this week, BUT I am so excited to sit down and talk to you guys. I realized that I’m halfway through my first semester of college (which is crazy) and I haven’t given you an update of how it’s going, so I thought I would do that today. Many people have been asking (and by many people I mean like 5) how I’m adjusting to this new lifestyle, so that’s what I’m going to be talking about in this post.

I had a rough start. I’m not going to candy coat any part of this because I want to be real. I sort of expected the change wouldn’t be easy, but those first few weeks I felt like I was being thrown into an unfamiliar ocean and had to figure out how to swim. Eventually I did figure it out, otherwise I wouldn’t be sitting here telling you this. Needless to say, I had a very difficult time getting started. I wasn’t prepared for how much time I would spend on homework and how hard it would be to just find some sort of a balance between school, work, and having a social life.

This semester I am taking 15 credit hours, which I feel is about the average course load. The way my school does classes, there are 8-week classes and 16-week classes. It’s honestly all very confusing, but to sum it up, 8-week classes are basically 16-week classes done in 8 weeks, which also means twice the amount of homework. I would say I spend about 8-10 hours on homework a week, depending on how much work there is/what the assignments are. It’s very difficult to tell exactly how much time I spend on it because my days are full of other things. On top of sitting in class for 15 hours a week, I’ve also been working 15 and a half hours each week.

It’s a lot. That’s why I’m so happy I can slow down and breathe this week.

I actually don’t mind staying busy. I’ve developed a pretty consistent routine, which is what I lacked in the beginning. I’m the type of person who must follow their routines, otherwise I don’t know what to do with myself. Routines are a huge part of my life. It took me about a month and a half to develop a solid routine to accommodate my new busy schedule. I made a video on my YouTube channel where I show you what it’s like to be me for a day. You can check that video out here.

I think one of the biggest things that’s kept me on track (besides lots of coffee) is staying healthy, mentally and physically. I use the tips I talked about in my last post almost daily and I’m way less stressed when I have my life planned and organized. I’ve been doing my best to become a morning person (still working on that part of my new routine) so I can get up, go to the gym, and then come back and get some tasks knocked out before I have to go to class or work. I’ve also been trying to stay on a healthy diet. This isn’t easy because I don’t have a lot of time to make good healthy meals. I try not to eat out more than necessary, and I try to meal prep on Sundays so I can just grab and go during the week. I think for me, staying healthy is super important to being successful.

On the upside of things, I am truly thriving. I don’t mean that I’m happy all the time every day, but in general I’m at a good place in life. In college I feel like I’m actually getting somewhere; I feel like I’m one step closer to where I want to be and sometimes that’s the only motivation factor that keeps me going. When times get rough, I have to stop and think about how far I’ve come already and stay focused on my goals and what I have to do to get there. Sometimes it’s difficult to stay focused, sometimes I question what it is that I’m really working towards, and sometimes I just want to quit. When that happens, I remind myself how far I’ve come and that I’m on the right path to where I want to be.

No one ever said college is easy. Because it’s not. It’s hard, it’s stressful, and it’s honestly. just. exhausting. But I know that I’m doing the right thing and I’m grateful that I am even able to go get further education. I value education more than almost anything because I know it’s what will get me to where I want to be in life.

Thank you guys so much for following along with me throughout this journey and I’ll talk to you in my next post!

#HowISurvivedHighSchool

#HowISurvivedHighSchool Part 5: Building the Foundation of Good Repuation

June 13, 2019

Hello and welcome back!

I’m so happy that you’re here to join me for part 5 of the #HowISurvivedHighSchool series. If you missed out on any of the previous parts, you can catch up here:

First and foremost, before I get started with today’s post I want to take a minute to say thank you for all the support I’ve received on my last post. It was not an easy thing for me to put out there, but I really believe God wanted me to share that message because I think it’s a message that’s important for the young people to hear in the midst of a world where everything is sexualized and there’s so much peer pressure. So I just wanted to say a huge thank you for all the support and encouraging messages I received after last week’s post.

Today I want to talk about something that’s not only important in high school; but is something that will follow you for the rest of your life: your social reputation. Now I want to stress that this is not about caring what people think of you- that’s not it at all. What I mean is building a good reputation so you can earn respect from people around you. I’ve spent the last 4 years working on this particular aspect of life and let me tell you, having a good reputation will serve you very well in years to come. Basically you’re just doing yourself a favor now.

So what exactly does it mean to have a good reputation? Everyone has different definitions for what a good reputation is, but to me someone with a good reputation exhibits the following characteristics: holds themselves well in bad situations, has good time management skills, and acts maturely. You want to be known for having good characteristics, not bad ones. I can think of a few people I know who are just outstanding at what they do and people know them and love them for the good things they’ve done and their kindness. That is a good reputation. I also know a few people who fall into the opposite category. These people do not have the characteristics of a good reputation and are known only for the bad choices they’ve unfortunately made. That is not a good reputation.

Why then is it important to build your reputation in high school? As I mentioned before, starting now will benefit you later, especially when it comes to getting decent jobs, applying for colleges, etc. People who start to drift off to the wrong direction in high school are more likely to have difficulty with those things down the road. I see this all the time in society and I’m sure you have too. People who are getting out of jail really struggle with getting back on their feet and living a decent life because their crimes are now glued to their name.

I did a blog post awhile back on temptation. Let me tell you, temptation is a devil in high school. However, if you can fight it then, it will be much easier to fight it in the future. I think the reason temptation is so present in high school in particular is because everyone is so easily influenced and it’s easy to give into peer pressure. I remember one time a few years ago I took a character development class and we had to fill out this paper and on it was a list of questions and we had to answer how likely we were to give into bad situations. I remember filling out that paper and checking all the boxes that said “not very likely to” and afterwards thinking “would I actually be able to say no?” I think sometimes we can be so naïve and think “if it’s just this one time it won’t hurt me.” I’ve learned over and over that no matter how big or small it may seem there’s always going to be consequences.

There will always be consequences to every action. No one likes to hear that and I’m sorry I had to be the one to tell you, but hear me out because I’m trying to save you now. The worst part about being a good kid is watching others make the wrong choices and trying to be the one to tell them they don’t have to or shouldn’t do it. I’m tired of being the bystander to bad situations, witnessing things I wish I hadn’t seen, and hearing things I wish I had never heard. It’s hard. Especially when people are telling you “you’re so pure and boring, you don’t know how to have any fun.” But to me, five minutes of “fun” isn’t worth a lifetime of consequences. It just isn’t.

I’ve had people tell me before “it’s okay, sure I messed up but Jesus forgives me and still loves me.” As true as that statement is, it’s not a free pass to do stuff you know is wrong. We are lucky to serve a merciful, forgiving God but that is not an excuse to do whatever we want. Forgiveness does not erase the weight of our sin. Furthermore, we must confess and acknowledge our mistakes before we can even be forgiven. In Acts 3:19 it says, “Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord.”

If you gathered anything from this short message, I hope it will encourage you to stray from the temptations of high school and to not conform to the ways of this modern world. Sometimes it feels like you’re missing out on the fun you could be having now, but I promise in the long run you will be successful and the people who made the wrong choices will be the ones missing out on greater opportunities. It’s very rewarding, I promise you.

#HowISurvivedHighSchool

#HowISurvivedHighSchool Part 3: The Truth About Friends and Friendships

May 29, 2019

Hi there, welcome back to the blog!

Today I’m back with another part of #HowISurvivedHighSchool. I’d like to know, are you guys enjoying it? Is there anything specific you’d like me to talk about at some point during the series? Leave me a comment or connect with me on social media and let me know. Also, if you aren’t caught up with the first two parts, I’ll link them here:

As always, I’m going to copy and paste the “rules” I posted in the first post. It’s important for me to mention them every time because I don’t want anything I say here to be taken out of context.

1. This is a 6 week series and a new part will be posted each Wednesday (so mark your calendars.)

2. I am NOT here to call anyone out or speak poorly of anyone I’ve encountered throughout my High School career. That’s not my vibe and my intentions of writing these posts are to encourage; not to bring anyone down.

3. I will be talking about certain people I’ve encountered and things I’ve experienced, but please know that NO NAMES will be mentioned; if a name has to be used it will be changed.

4. All the things I am going to tell you are true and are my stories that I have a right to tell.

5. Please read/listen with open ears and hearts.

6. Some of the topics I will be discussing are mature and very series at times so if you can’t handle the intensity, please feel free to click out at any time.

So today I wanted to talk about a very important part of high school: friends. Friends play a very significant role in your life so I think it’s important to build ones that last. Unfortunately I’ve had very little luck with that, especially in high school, and I’ve learned that most people are going to come and go out of your life but there will always be those few people who come into your life and stay for a long time.

I remember at the end of 8^th grade I saw this post online and it said “the people you hang out with in middle school aren’t going to be around for all of high school” and now at the end of high school I can fully confirm that saying is 100% true. During high school everyone goes through so many changes and sometimes people don’t change with you. Furthermore, high school is vastly different from middle school; it’s almost like a totally different world. Everyone is basically trying to figure out themselves and who they are as a person. Sometimes this creates tension in your relationships.

So in high school there are these things called “cliques.” What that is essentially is a group of people that gravitate towards each other in large groups. In a sociology class I took a while back, we learned that people with similar personalities tend to form these cliques. However, from what I’ve seen, cliques are just another way to stereotype. You’ll see where this information comes into play when it comes to friendships in a moment.

Something I haven’t talked about much on here is my experience at co-op. Some of you probably don’t know what it is, so I’ll explain quickly. What it is basically is a group of homeschool families that meets weekly to have classes like art, science, and drama, in addition to the work at home. I was involved in my co-op for 8 years. Looking back, there were a few pleasant memories made, but for me it was just not a good environment for me to grow up in. Out of all the people that were there and friends I made, on this current day I am not in contact with any of them. I’ll get to why in a bit.

In my grade there were 3 cliques. The first one was made up of the “popular” kids, if you will. The second group was the kids who were the quiet, more introverted ones and the last group were the kids with disabilities. It sounds so stereotypical, but for the purpose of this post you need to know. As the years went on and we got older, it only became more stereotypical. In the beginning it was easy to do group activities because everyone talked to everyone, but the “popular group” only became more distant from everyone else.

You might be wondering where I fit into these groups. To be honest, I really didn’t fit into any of them; I just bounced around between all three because I really tried to get along with everyone. My longtime best friend was in the popular group so I spent a lot of time with them, but I didn’t really fit in with them and was often left out or in the back of the group. No big deal at first, I still hung around the other groups.

Then something happened in summer of 2014 that changed the course of my friendships with these people. I’m not going to take the time to explain what happened, but long story short me and one of the populars had a very public falling out on social media. It resulted in most people taking sides, and everyone pretty much took this other girl’s side. The situation itself is not significant anymore but the tension never left. Life went on though, this girl and I never reconciled (even after I made 2 attempts) but everyone else seemed to get along just fine.

There were some big problems with these people. The popular ones. There is a reason I eventually chose to distance myself from them. At co-op they were constantly having attitudes, making unkind remarks to other students, and just flat out acting stuck-up. There is no better word for it. There were major bullying issues and the adults did next to nothing about it. Some of them even contributed to the problems. People were skipping out of gym because the teacher always favorited the populars and the other kids weren’t treated fairly. Some of the behavior I witnessed from these kids makes me sick to my stomach to this day whenever I think about it. One time, one of the said popular kids said to my friend (and I quote) “I’m better than you.” I’m.better.than.you. No other context, just “I’m better than you.” I will never be able to erase that from my mind. And her attitude that came with it, her parents should be ashamed.

One thing I’ve learned after all these years is that sometimes you don’t realize how badly you’re being treated until that person is out of your life. The way things ended with these people was far from good terms, but I’m so happy they are out of my life because I have people in my life now that made me realize how bad these people were for me. I haven’t spoken to these people in two years. However, I have ran into them a few times in public since then and I have to say, for people who proudly call themselves “Christians”, their behavior towards me was far from Christian like. Little or no eye contact, pretending I’m not even there at all, not even a wave or smile. It’s really hard to believe they were what I once called my best friends.

After going through a very, very dark and scary period of my life in 2017, things finally started to look up. I wasn’t feeling depressed anymore, I actually wanted to leave my house, and I met some new amazing people who have changed my life. People who genuinely care about me, make time to spend with me, and aren’t ashamed to be seen with me. They helped me get to a better place in my life and allow me to be myself. I thank God for giving me the strength to let the bad ones go and for bringing better people into my life.

There’s a quote by Alexander Graham Bell that I think beautifully illustrate this: “When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.” I like to remind myself of this whenever a relationship ends or an opportunity falls through. There is always a reason and most of the time it’s because God is making room for bigger and better things. So if things aren’t going well right now, just remember that it could be a sign that there are better things coming.

I want to be completely honest with you for a moment. I recently celebrated my graduation (which I’ll be talking about in an upcoming post) and I had three friends show up. Now I had plenty of other people too, but my point is, you can have all the friends in the world but out of all those there will only be a few real ones. I didn’t even think about the people who didn’t come because I’m thankful I have three really good friends that took the time to celebrate my graduation with me. I’d take that over having many fake friends any day.

So if you take away anything from this post, here’s three main points I want you to remember. First, don’t hangout where you know you don’t fit in. Second, let go of those unhealthy relationships in your life! Remember, when a door closes another one opens. Third, value your close friends. They are the ones that are going to be around for a long time.

#HowISurvivedHighSchool

#HowISurvivedHighSchool Part 2: We're Not All the Same

May 22, 2019

Hey there, welcome back to my blog!

In case you haven’t heard, I’m in the middle of a series called #HowISurvivedHighSchool. If you clicked on this post and saw the title, you should already know. So this is going to be part 2, but if you haven’t read part one, you can read that post here.

In the last post I made some “rules” about this series. I’m going to post them again in every post just so we’re all in the same understanding. Today I’m going to talk about some pretty heavy stuff so feel free to click out at any point.

1. This is a 6 week series and a new part will be posted each Wednesday (so mark your calendars.)

3. I will be talking about certain people I’ve encountered and things I’ve experienced, but please know that NO NAMES will be mentioned; if a name has to be used it will be changed.

4. All the things I am going to tell you are true and are my stories that I have a right to tell.

5. Please read/listen with open ears and hearts.

6. Some of the topics I will be discussing are mature and very series at times so if you can’t handle the intensity, please feel free to click out at any time.

Today I want to address something that is becoming a huge issue in our society: the fact that teenagers are gaining such a bad reputation in society and how I avoided being “one of those kids”. I want to speak mostly to my younger audience, but I want the older ones to listen with open ears so that maybe you’ll understand that we aren’t all the same.

So one time I was at work and just to give you a little background of this story, it was pretty early in the morning and I hadn't had enough coffee yet to get me going. It was also the day after the 4th of July and the night before I was up late working at the county fair so you can imagine how tired I was. Anyway, this lady sitting at the counter says to me “you look like you were up late partying.” Now keep in mind I did know her and knew she was only joking, but it got me thinking. I thought, “Well that's probably what most people my age did last night so no wonder someone would assume something like that.”

I think the reason my generation has such a bad reputation these days is due to the small fraction that do choose to go down the wrong paths. Those are the ones who you see in the news stories. “Local teens vandalize park equipment”, “a group of teens were found guilty in a drug case”, and so forth. You rarely ever see people my age make the news for something good. It’s depressing, really. While we’re on the topic, just a small piece of advice: don’t read the news. It really puts a damper on your potential to live care free.

So what causes kids to go down the wrong path? There are many answers to this question and it all depends on the case you’re looking at. Some possibilities can be mental health, physical health, bad influences, and family. Now I’m not a psychologist or anything but I can tell you almost every single person I know personally who has had drug/alcohol problems also has family issues at home. Which actually makes sense if you think about it; compare the divorce rate (40-50%) to the percentage of teens who have misused drugs (50%) and alcohol (63%.) This is certainly not the case with every teen, but there is clearly a relationship between the two.

Enough statistics though, I want to tell you a little bit about how this relates to my life and how it affected my High School career. First and foremost, I want to say that I have never misused any type of drug or drank any type of alcohol during my High School career. Period. Why? The short answer is frankly because it doesn’t sound appealing to me. Now let me make it clear that because we’re talking about High School there is ALWAYS the pressure to “do what everyone else is doing” and to “fit in with the crowd.”

The devil is very good at filling our minds and ears with tempting thoughts. I along with probably almost every single High Schooler in America have struggled with temptation at some point or another. It’s difficult when you’re still growing up and figuring everything out and the people around you are already dealing with adult issues. I think one of the hardest parts is being in the middle and watching someone you love destroy their life and their relationships because they gave into the temptation.

One of the biggest reasons that keeps me from being one of them is because I’ve seen this happen over and over again to people I know and love dearly. It’s heartbreaking because they get so caught up in being on this high and feeling good that they don’t realize how they’re destroying their life until it’s too late. And you can’t even help them because they’re so bound to this new lifestyle. I had someone one time trying to convince me that smoking weed is good for you. You have to be head deep in lies to believe that. I suppose it makes people feel better about themselves if they try to twist their addiction into something that “benefits their health.”

The best thing you can do in your High School career to avoid being caught up in the same lies as everyone else is to surround yourself with the right people. It only takes one unhealthy relationship to develop the same habits as them and I think that’s what happens to a lot of people in High School. Find people who will make sure you’re staying on the right path and will hold you accountable for your actions. It is much easier to go to someone and say “hey, I’m struggling with temptation again. Can you help me?” Then to try to fight it yourself.

No one prepared me for some of the issues that I had to deal with. The thing was, they weren’t my own issues but they still affected me nonetheless. People always taught me how to say no to being peer pressured into it myself but no one taught me how to help others who are struggling with it. No one prepared me for the phone call I got one night from a friend after a bad breakup saying they had one too many beers that night. No one prepared me to watch someone get kicked out of youth group because they were high. The only thing worse than dealing with the issues yourself is being a bystander and watching it happen to someone else. That will always be enough reason for me to say no.

I have too good of a life to just throw it all away for a high that’s only temporary. I’ve worked hard to be respected in society and part of that is not involving myself in things that could potentially ruin the reputation I’ve worked so hard to gain. And I hope and pray that this message opens the eyes of someone who may be struggling with one of these issues. Because trust me, once you get to the point in your life where you’re happier than any drug or drink makes you; you won’t ever want to change that.

National drug/alcohol Helpline: 1-888-633-3239

Bible

Through Trials of Temptation...

June 25, 2018

Through Trials of Temptation…

This post is going to be a little different than what I usually write about. I’m not giving you tips on how to live a good life, telling you what to eat, or what make-up products to use. I’m hoping that today we can have a heart-to-heart conversation about a problem that is very real and persistent in the lives of so many people. I prayed a lot before I opened my computer to start writing this. And I pray that you will open up your soul to receive the message I’m going to attempt to convey here.

The only resource I’m using today in this post is my Bible. I want this to speak to everyone reading this, but specifically the young people here like me, who may be struggling with this issue right at this moment. There are so many issues going on in our world today that people my age are struggling with and maybe they don’t have anyone to tell them these stories, or maybe they don’t know Jesus at all. Whatever the case may be, I want this to speak to them.

Eve was the first human to struggle with this. God had given her and Adam one simple rule to follow. That rule was that they could eat from any tree in the garden of Eden, all except for the tree of the knowledge of good and evil (Genesis 2:16). So God told Adam that he could have the fruit from ANY tree he wanted except for that specific tree, or if they did then they would certainly die. He had a lot of options in the garden for food. But one day after Eve was created from Adam’s rib, a serpent came along and asked if she and Adam were allowed to eat fruit from the garden. Eve told the serpent what God had said. The serpent told Eve that they would not die if they ate the fruit, but that they would be like God and know good and evil (Genesis 3:4-5).

So here she was, in the middle of the garden talking to this serpent, Eve probably didn’t know what to do. She could just ignore the temptation and follow the rule God had given her and Adam, or she could eat the fruit like the serpent told her to do. Well, Eve gave in and ate the fruit. After she ate some herself, she gave some to Adam (and here we also see Adam being tempted by his wife, Eve) who also ate the fruit from the forbidden tree. This is where sin first began.

Once they had eaten the fruit, what happened next? Did they die immediately like God said they would? No, but as you can imagine, God wasn’t so happy. The first humans had disobeyed him and He decided they must be punishment. His punishment for man and woman was not death as He had first said, but He punished them by giving them physical and emotional pain that would affect them later in life (Genesis 3:14-19).

Because Eve gave into temptation, sin entered the world. If Eve hadn’t given into the temptation and didn’t eat from the forbidden tree, could you imagine what our world would be like? No one would make mistakes, no one would make bad choices, there would be no such thing as a crime, everything would be perfect. Not exactly. Because when we sin, we learn from those mistakes and those lessons make us wiser for the future.

Let’s take a look at another example from God’s word. This time we’re in Matthew chapter 4, during the time when Jesus was fasting for 40 days. He was led into the wilderness by Satan, who told Him to make stones into bread (Matthew 4:3-4). Jesus resisted, only to be tempted again by Satan to throw Himself off of a high point on a temple (Matthew 4:5-7). Again, Jesus resisted. After that, Satan told Him to worship him and he would give Jesus kingdoms and thrones. By this time, Jesus had had enough and sent the devil away.

Jesus did not give into the temptation. Keep in mind, He was also fasting so He was probably very hungry. But Jesus does not give into any kind of temptations. He is the example we should live by each time we are tempted by something in our lives. We cannot resist temptation as easily as Jesus, because we are only human and not perfect. But we can surround ourselves with positive people and influences that will help us make good decisions.

If you’ve ever been in a tempting situation, you know it’s not so easy to say no. In fact, it will probably be one of the hardest things you’ll ever have to do. But the one thing you can do is in that moment, just pray and ask God for His guidance on what you should do. Then all you have to do is ask yourself, “would Jesus do this?” That should help you and give you all the wisdom you need to make the best choice.

Adam and Eve brought sin into this world, but you always have a choice to sin. We are not perfect and will always make mistakes, but luckily we have a forgiving father in Heaven who does not judge us by our past mistakes and loves us even when we do wrong. There is nothing greater than His love and grace and He is with us in every situation we face.

age

Sixteen

March 09, 2018

sixteen.

To me, an age does not define a year in my life. Just like numbers do not define success. We all grow and develop at different ages, so it wouldn’t be fair to say that we all go through certain things at one age. How old were you when you first learned to walk? I’m sure your answer would be different than mine, because we grow at different times in our life. Just like it isn’t fair to say every baby starts to talk in the same month.

I believe as humans, we are constantly developing, learning new things, and growing, no matter how old we are. If you thought you were done changing after puberty, you were wrong. Our bodies and minds never stop changing. I think this is one of the most beautiful things about life because I always hear about how it’s impossible for someone to change their ways. It is true that some parts of you will always remain the same, but I believe it is always possible for someone to better themselves with a lot of work.

So it was my sixteenth year of life. I sat down here to write this with no plan in mind for this and no idea of what I wanted to talk about. Then I remembered something I read on someone else’s blog about how for every year older they get, they choose a word that defined that past year. I’m going to did something similar to that, but I had more than just one word that came to mind when I thought about this last year: change, lessons, and growth.

A year of change.

This was when I really began to feel like an adult. I got a job, I lost jobs, I learned how to operate a vehicle, I went to prom, I began to think seriously about my future. All of those things were things that a few years ago seemed very far away, but now they feel so very close and are approaching so quickly.

I’ve talked about my job before, but for those reading this that don’t know me, I work at a local coffee shop and I’m not biased or anything but I think it’s the best job in the world. When I was younger I always dreaded the day when I would have to step behind the counter at McDonalds and serve a half-cooked hamburger to some strange looking person. But I was blessed enough to receive this opportunity almost a year ago for a place I never thought I would be able to work at. I never thought I would “enjoy” going to work, but here I am counting down the days until my next shift.

In two weeks I’ll get to go to prom for the second time. Last year it was so amazing and I’m more than thrilled to be attending again this year. I really want to a more “in depth” prom post than last year so let me know if that’s something you would want to see. I’m also considering doing a “vlog” (video blog) of the day so maybe I can get that out there for you guys too. Besides all that, the excitement this year is almost double the excitement of last year and I can’t wait to have this wonderful experience again.

But all of these things are signs that yes, my childhood is ending and it’s almost time to be an….an….adult. I thought it got bad when I couldn’t eat off the kids menu anymore but now I know there are bigger changes I must face. In all seriousness, however, it has been a bittersweet thing for me. Even though the thought of being on my own in the future is extremely terrifying sometimes, I’m ready for it.

Lessons to Learn.

It’s in my nature to do things the hard way. Not that I choose to though, it was just an unfortunate characteristic I was born with and never got rid of. Despite the unfortunateness, it has helped me tremendously in some cases over the past year. The other day I happened to be reading a book and one chapter was about suffering and why suffering exists. This was something that caught my attention because it’s something I myself have spent years wondering about. If we are in the presence of an all-powerful God who is capable of performing miracles, why must we suffer?

The answer is quite simple if we think about it. If there was no suffering and life went smoothly, there would be no opportunities to show strength, bravery, and courage in times of trial. It’s like how if there were no rainy days, the plants and flowers would all die because they need the rain and darkness to make them stronger and beautiful during the sunny days. That’s why suffering exists in our lives. This is just yet another reason to prove that God really is in control of our lives and knows what He’s doing when He allows us to suffer.

That’s one of the many hard lessons I learned while I was sixteen. Through times of trial, we gain wisdom and strength we didn’t have before. That’s what happened to me at least. I would not be the person I am today if I hadn’t gone through the things I did. Now looking back on those experiences, I’m thankful for the knowledge I was able to gain from them.

A Year of Growth.

When I say growth I don’t mean physically. As much as I wish that happened, I’m still probably the same height I was last year and probably even the year before. No, the kind of growing that occurred this year was a growth spurt that took place on the inside. I’m going to try to wrap this up without being too cheesy, but let me just explain.

When I look back at myself from this time last year, I see someone who was in the wrong place. Now please understand it could have been a lot worse, but to me it was far from where I wanted to be. I was immature, caught up and feelings, and made poor choices. Again like I said it could have been a lot worse, but I was still veering off the path. Some of those things are things that come naturally with this age I guess, but I wasn’t proud.

The thing that changed all that was developing a closer relationship with God. One thing I was doing back then was I kept trying to fill in this empty space in my heart with people, searching for something that I was unable to find. Over the summer was when I really got connected with God again. I started praying and reading my Bible regularly, going to church whenever I could. Ever since then I’ve felt like a completely different person.

I was also bitter for a long time. It seemed like the suffering never ended, and I didn’t understand why things happened to me. I still don’t completely understand, but my mindset has changed. Instead of being angry and bitter towards the world, I opened my mind to choosing to forgive and love, despite the things I had been through. Loving people who have done you wrong isn’t easy, and I’m still learning. There’s this quote that says “building a new relationship is good. But restoring a broken one is better”. That’s something I’ve been trying to work on, and just trying to keep my relationships strong and healthy.

What’s Ahead.

Every day is new and exciting. It’s always changing along with us ourselves. Being sixteen was fun, but I’m ready to see what kinds of things this new year and new age have in store. So with that being said, I’m going to go prepare for the big day tomorrow. I’ll see you in my next post!

freedom

Freedom

January 19, 2017

Today I wanted to touch on somewhat of a lighter topic than my previous posts. I realize that I can be a very dark and emotional person (because 99.9% of the time I am), and not everyone likes to read that stuff, so today I want to talk about the freedom we have.

The inspiration of this post comes from the fact that I just finished my World History lesson for the day, which has been growing more and more depressing by the day. Today I read about the Great Terror (for those who aren’t familiar, the Great Terror took went down in 1937 and 1938 in Russia under the rule of Joseph Stalin who followed the ideas of Communism and punished anyone who dared to go against him. Similar to Adolf Hitler’s persecution of the Jews in Germany). And I couldn’t help but think about the wonderful freedom we have here in America.

Going back to the Great Terror (I might ramble about it because I’m a big History person), it’s hard to believe that millions of innocent people died in what was called the Gulag System, a prison labor camp where millions were worked to death with little or no food and water, not to mention the freezing conditions in Siberia where most of these camps were located. Some of these people had a right to be there. They were real criminals who had committed crimes such as murder and deserved to be there. But most were innocent people such as farmers who wouldn’t give their crops to the government as Stalin had demanded. They barely had enough food to provide for their families and were not about to give it up to the government.

Why am I telling you all this sad and depressing History? Well, I would hope that you already were thankful to live in a free country like America, but if you weren’t, I hope that this information makes you even more grateful. Now obviously America, just like any other country, has experienced hardships as well, but none nowhere as near as bad as Russia, Germany, and many others. We have been given rights here in America, such as the freedom of speech and the freedom for each person to choose their religion.

Tomorrow (Friday, January 20) is Inauguration Day, the second reason why I chose to write about this. Donald J. Trump will take the oath of office and become the next President of the United States. I’m not going to go into politics right now because I’m so done with talking about it and if you know me, you already know my opinion (but let me know if you want another post on politics because I’d be more than happy to write it). Anyway, back to what I was saying. Some people are upset about the results of the election, but please remember that we are still a country. We are still united under the Constitution and no president can ever change that.

History shapes us. It makes us who we are today. We as humans are meant to make mistakes, and also to learn something from them. I say this all the time, but there IS a reason for everything. Things don’t just happen with no explanation. Sometimes it is meant for us to know the explanation, other times we will never know. All I can say is that the future of this country is not in the hands of the President. Our country was founded on the grounds of Christianity. Whether you choose to believe or not is something only you can decide, but Christians know that God has a plan for this country, as well as every other country on Earth and no person can ever change that.

change

Change

January 09, 2017

Since it’s the beginning of a new year, I felt it fitting to talk about change. Some people welcome change into their lives, while others find it hard to accept it (such as myself). If you’ve been wearing your hair the same way for four years, why would you want to change that if it’s what you like and what you’re used to? Probably because you don’t realize how much a change is needed. It never hurts to branch out and try something new every once and awhile.

Change has never been easy for me, but I can certainly say it’s taught me a lot in my life. Fortunately, God decides when it’s time for a change, because otherwise I wouldn’t be where I am today. I love my routines and habits so much, that I don’t even realize how bad they may be. Or maybe they’re not necessarily bad, it’s just time to grow out of them and try something different.

And not all changes will be good. Sometimes it’s hard to understand why things happen the way they do, but you just have to remember that there is a reason for it, even if the reason isn’t clear in the beginning. Maybe moving to another state and to a different school isn’t what you desired, but maybe it was time to experience new things and meet new people.

Nothing here on earth is permanent. I hate to break it to you, but nothing lasts forever. Things are always going to be constantly changing. People are going to come and go from your life, because people and their feelings are constantly changing as well. Someone you love today may not be the person you’ll love in five years. Your teacher may decide teaching just isn’t her thing anymore, and she wants to try a different occupation.

So you see, you can’t hold onto things forever. You can squeeze it in your hands as tight as you can, but it will eventually slip away. And there’s absolutely nothing you can do about it. You just have to accept that it wasn’t meant for you anymore and you’ll come across something better. That is the pattern of life. If there wasn’t change and everything stayed the same, no one would ever learn anything. We wouldn’t be wise. We would just keep making the same mistakes over and over again because we wouldn’t know any different.

Change is hard. But no one said life was going to be easy. The things we experience daily can change our lives for better or for worse, but with every change comes a reason and a lesson for it that will, in the end, make you a wiser person if you choose to learn from it.

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A College Life Update

#HowISurvivedHighSchool Part 5: Building the Foundation of Good Repuation

#HowISurvivedHighSchool Part 3: The Truth About Friends and Friendships

#HowISurvivedHighSchool Part 2: We're Not All the Same

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