There’s something that’s been bugging me the past few days that I want to talk about.  I’m pretty much an open book so I figured what better place to talk about it than here with you.  Obviously I never use names when I talk about personal situations like this, so I’m not trying to call anybody out or put them in an awkward position.  Just thought I’d mention that.

                So there’s this guy (I swear that’s how almost all of my stories start lol) that I have never met in person but I know who he is through mutual friends (you know those kind of people?  I have a lot of them).  Anyway, so he friended me online and I didn’t think anything of it until he sent me a message the next day that said something like:

“hi I don’t think I know you but you’re really pretty and I thought I would just tell you that and I wouldn’t mind talking to you”.

Awwww.

No.

                My first reaction was what most girls my age would have thought: aww a guy thinks I’m cute.  How nice!  But then after I let it sink in, I didn’t feel as flattered as I maybe should have.  Of course it’s a good feeling whenever someone compliments you, but after we started talking, I just couldn’t shake the feeling that he only wanted to talk to me because he saw my picture and thought I was pretty.  It wasn’t a very flattering feeling anymore…….

                I hate how our culture glorifies the way you look, how much makeup you wear, and the clothes you have on.  Especially for women.  It’s easy for a man to see a picture of a famous model in lingerie and think “wow she’s hot”, and vice versa.  What if she wasn’t wearing makeup?  What if he didn’t have a six pack?  Would you still feel that attraction to them?  Probably not. 

                It’s a normal thing for humans to be attracted to other humans based on their outward looks and appearance.  And I’m definitely not saying it’s wrong.  If you’re in a relationship, you should always tell your partner how good they look.  It could make someone’s day if you compliment them (as unflattered as I feel now, I will admit that it did make me feel good about myself).  What I’m saying is that it shouldn’t be the only thing that attracts you to them.

                Let me present a question: do you believe in love at first sight?  There is no right or wrong answer to this question.  It all depends on what your opinion is.  For me personally, I’m going to have to say no because I just don’t think you can instantly love someone.  Maybe it’s because it hasn’t happened to me, but I don’t think I can love someone I just met.  If that were the case, I have a feeling that relationship wouldn’t go well after a couple of days (the only reason I say that is because there was one time in my life where I thought love at first sight was real, but now I’ve learned that it’s just another fairy tale myth and does not end happily).  But maybe it does happen to some people.  I can only speak for myself.

                As a Christian, I also have morals just like any Christian should when choosing a partner.  When I was younger, I didn’t have any personal boundaries and I regret that now.  I just let guys walk all over me because I was afraid of making them angry.  When I met the guy I mentioned earlier, I told him that I just couldn’t jump into a relationship with someone I met less than a week ago.  I told him that we would have to be really good friends first, and I would need to feel more comfortable with him.  And also that if he really does like me, he will wait until I am ready to take on the commitment of a relationship.  I’m sixteen years old.  I don’t want to mess around anymore.  I’ve had my fair share of reckless decisions in a relationship, but I want something real.  Something that will last.  I can’t know that in a week.  It takes time.

                Many people these days (especially young people) tend to rush into relationships quickly because they think they know the person enough to love them.  And while I can’t speak for those people, I can say that they are nowhere near close enough to knowing them enough to love them.  Most married couples are still learning new things about each other every day!  It doesn’t happen fast.  That’s why relationships don’t last when you’re young.  And there are some people that just want to date to date.  It doesn’t matter if they like the other person or not, they will date them anyway.  I find these types of situations really sad because there is a match for everyone and they might never meet the right person if they mess around with people who don’t really care for and love them.

                Being in and waiting for the perfect relationship takes patience.  If there’s one piece of good advice I have from my experience, it would be to be patient.  A relationship tests your patience every day.  Sometimes you just want to throw a chair at the other person and it takes every bit of patience you have not to.  It’s normal.  Couples argue all the time over stupid little things, and usually it’s because you or the other person have lost your patience.  And if you’re not in a relationship, it will take all the patience you have not to just date any person that comes along.   But if you’re patient, God will place the perfect person in your life at just the right time.

                Well friends, that’s all I have to say for now.  I could ramble for a long time about relationships, but I’ll save that for another day.  As a reminder to look not just for someone with a pretty face, but someone who’s beautiful on the inside as well, I’m going to insert one of my favorite songs down below!

 Fall in love with someone with a beautiful soul!<3